The Punisher is my Spirit Animal

The Punisher is my Spirit Animal

Monday, December 19, 2016

Book Project For ONE PUNCH MAN: Short Fanfiction: I Moved To Saitama, Japan

Chapter 1: Z

     I take another confused look at the small slip of paper and then back at the door that I catch myself standing in front of. I didn't think that it would be like this.

     You might be wondering 'ok, where are you' or 'why are there in the first place' or even 'what the heck bro', but don't worry, I got you. Having the grit to want to and the money to do it, I decided to fly my dense American self over the pacific ocean from California to Japan. Why you might ask? Because I am a nosy journalist who needed a really extravagant and exciting story, but I had none to tell. So, desperate, I browsed the web for hours until I stumbled across some Japanese website. 

     Looking from the boring tourist stuff to the weird merchandise, I went to the breaking news, and then Bam! Some crap about some Heroes Association showed up in the headlines. Navigating my way onto the interesting website that I had to translate, I found that there was a program specifically and oddly convenient for journalists to 'study' a hero. So I pressed the good ol' Get A Hero button, and here I am.

     Japan has a registered place for heroes due to the increasing threat of monsters appearing and destroying their cities, and a story can't get any more intriguing than that. I just didn't expect to end up here. All of the cities names in the country go by single letters, and I ended up in City Z...

     That's it, just Z.

     Finally accepting the fact that this is the right address, I suck in my breath and lift my fist up to the door. My nervously feeble hand barely taps the door, and I stand anxiously waiting for someone to answer.

     "Who are you?" A extremely bald but shockingly young man answers the door. No older than 23 and eyeing me with the most blank expression, my heart drops.

     "Uh..." I stutter. "I'm Alayna Staten. A-are you Genos?"

     "I am." Both baldy and I look over his shoulder at a cyborg that looks around my age, which is about 19, and with a full head of hair, but just as intimidating.

     As the cyborg leads me in the place, now quarreling with the bald one over my stay, I tune them out and look at myself compared to the both of them. My seemingly small height, my feminine looks, my human brain... 

     Where's the bleach when I need it? 

Chapter 2: Triggered

     Luckily, the bald guy didn't mind me staying, but I decided not to bombard anyone with questions yet. The air in the place is unsettlingly awkward, it's like they have never been occupied in the same space with a person with two X chromosomes before. Baldy lays on his mat thing watching TV as Genos sits by what an American would call, a coffee table and surfs the web on his laptop, no one exchaging any kind of looks or words.

     Eventually getting bored with myself and the silence, I sit next to the 'to cool to make conversation' cyborg. Getting use to the Japanese and lack of furniture is going to take me a bit as I squirm to sit comfortably by the coffee table. I look over to his computer to see what is on his screen, but the moment I look at it, I look away, because it is all in Japanese, and I'm not going to take the time t read it.

     Trying to be annoying, I purposely disrupt him from whatever he is doing and ask, "What is that guy's name?" hinting at the one with the shining dome.

     Not even bothering to look at me, Genos says, "Saitama."

     I mean, I guess. "Cool..."

     I remain sitting in an painfully awkward state, wondering when someone will acknowledge my random existence, but no one does, and I guess that means that I must go the annoying route. Just as I am about to start harassing Genos, Saitama calls his name, and the cyborg immediately perks up at chants, "Yes, Sensei?"

     I try not cringe into oblivion as those words spilled out of his barely human mouth. His tore shirt, black jeans, and biker boots strongly contradict his overly obedient personality.

     Observing, I watch as Saitama points to his television screen. In record timing I see that Genos is ready to go someplace for his 'sensei'. Stopping before he walks out he turns to me and asks me if I want to join him. Not really wanting to, I get up anyway and follow him.

     "Where are we going?" I question.

     "Grocery shopping," Genos answers bluntly.

     Wow, so amazing. 

     As we stroll into the inner city, unwelcoming stares head my way. I don't know if it's Genos or me. Is it cause I'm black? Or because I'm walking next to the literal Iron Man?

     A hand waves in front of my face, returning me to the earth.

Chapter 3: Fite Me

     Genos stares at me quizzically, but then all of a sudden, he disappears. The next thing I know, the air is knocked right out of me as I land back first on cement. 

     My survival instincts kick in, making me get up and hold up my fists, but then there is a detail that I had failed to realise. How the heck did I end up on the top of a tower?

     UGH, why is this happening to me? It's only been five minutes since I got here.

     "Don't like heights, huh?" My head swings over to some guy that looks like he LIVES at Hot Topic.

     "Who the heck are you?" I ask. 

     "Speed o' Sound Sonic," the guy answers proudly.

     I hold back a laugh at his redundant, and rather stupid, name. "OK dude. I guess. You sound like a knock-off variation of Sonic the Hedgehog."

       By the angered look on his face, I assume that he doesn't take his infamous title lightly, but before he goes all crazy with his sword, I ask, "What do you want from me anyway?"

     "I was actually going after the cyborg, but then you just so happened to get in the way."

     "Well maybe you shouldn't have been snatching people up in the first place, huh?"

     Sanic buddy, done with me, lunges straight at me with his katana at a deathly speed. I barely catch the blade in between my hands and cover the sheet of iron in ice. After a second or two, it shatters.

     Speedy looks at his bladeless sword with twitching eyes. "My sword..." He begins. "That was my third replacement!"


     Before he can even shed a tear, in the distance we hear a thundering boom. My god, this place is crazy.

To be Continued... Maybe...

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